Greatness starts with gratitude. ~Good Vibes, Good Life, Vex King
I am grateful for…
I have done some version of gratitude journaling for years, and while I appreciate the call to focus more on what’s working in my life than on what isn’t, the gratitude flow often ends when I put my pen down and I go back to the regular rhythm of my day. The gratitude stays on the page, and doesn’t always connect to the felt sense of gratitude, which is where I think our true greatness lies.
Oftentimes, when we - or someone in front of us - express an emotion - especially one that is intense or difficult - we are at a loss as to what to do. Do we listen intently and try to maintain eye contact, deflect with a joke because we’re uncomfortable, or pat their arm in a feeble “there, there” gesture? Do we attempt an awkward hug? Do we find a way to commiserate or make some up excuse to leave the situation? Do we offer a snack? We are flooded with our emotional impotence in the power of what’s being expressed to us. Yet…what if we let ourselves be drawn in by the opportunity to create meaningful, messy, yet hopelessly sublime human connection with the person in front of us, who is taking a huge risk in sharing what’s really going on with them? Going beyond, “I’m fine.” We can’t let those moment pass us by. Pay attention. What if?
We all long for connection. To be truly seen, heard, and accepted for our authentic selves and expression of those selves. One of the things I longed for in my relationship was to lay everything down sometimes. To feel safe in taking a few steps back as a mental or emotional break, or bring a much-needed perspective shift to the situation at hand. To hold space for that display of vulnerability, to view it as the holy and harrowing act it was because of the emotional nakedness that must accompany it. To let that moment exist without judgment or a need to solve it. To trust I would find my way through to the other side with renewed strength, insight, and a greater ability to pick things up again, my body, mind, and soul replenished and grateful for the respite. I’m learning to do that for myself now, which is one of the many silver linings of all the challenge and change from my life this year, and I’m not half-bad at it. We contain multitudes.
It is in these unarmored moments where we catch glimpses of our greatness. We feel our greatness. We understand a little better, we are moved in some way, we feel grateful for who we are and how we were created. We embrace, if for a fleeting moment, the unique and vast beings we are. We contain multitudes.
Here are some questions for self-reflection on gratitude and and greatness; if you feel moved to do so, I’d love to hear your thoughts/ideas in the comments below - thank you for reading and for sharing with our Changemakers’ community!
What are some ways you express gratitude in your life?
Is there someone/something in particularly you are grateful for? What’s one way you can show them you honor their greatness in your life and that you are grateful for them being in your life?
How do you tend to respond to intense emotions/feelings? What are some ways this response could move you towards a greater sense of gratitude for the emotions/feelings being expressed to you?
I try to express gratitude both internally and externally. I've found it important to acknowledge my growth and progress within myself, as it's easy to just go onto the next thing without any celebration or recognition of the road I've traveled to-date. I'm also being way more conscious about telling people not just that I'm grateful for them being in my life, but being specific about what I'm grateful for about them. It's creating a deeper level of connection with folks, which - in turn - creates a deeper level of gratitude all around. A good cycle to be in! :)